No we are not singing as we climb over the green hills to get away from the Nazis. This is a list of some of my favorite (or maybe not so favorite) things about Santa Barbara and the people in them...
WEIRD/HOMELESS PEOPLE (not always one in the same):
(I have to admit its entertaining most of the time...)
1. An old man mumbling, then yelling out "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" then mumbling again in the middle of Starbucks...and he only gets a glance from everyone in there. Then walks out in the pouring rain wearing bermuda shorts mumbling to himself all the way home.
2. A guy walking into Albertsons dressed in a bright yellow rain suit (hat and all) like he's the Gorton's fisherman... Did I mention it had only been sprinkling the whole day?
3. The only place where you will see a rat riding a cat riding a dog.
4. Homeless people give each other "knowing" glances as they pass each other on the street like they are in their own special club.
5. Homeless people are out on State street 12 months out of the year. And since there is "competition" they have to get creative in order to get money. Like: "fishing for money" (cup attached to a "fishing pole") or "I want beer", that one always makes me laugh, OR my FAVORITE "hey do you want my fries?" "NO"...WTF!? homeless guy's getting greedy!!!
I could go on forever about homeless people...
DRIVING:
(UGH)
1. If a cloud even lets out ONE drop of rain, DO NOT even think about driving faster than 45 on the freeway. OK guys, just because it only rains 2 times a year does not mean that you all the sudden have forgotten how to drive.
2. Even if it's not raining, there will still be some idiot IN THE FAST LANE going 45...I am not even exaggerating, it happened a couple weeks ago.
3. In Isla Vista (where UCSB is) if you are driving a car, do not expect to get anywhere very fast. Bicycles EVERYWHERE, and they don't give a shit if you are in a car. And apparently pedestrians feel the same way because a guy WALTZED in front of my car, I had to slam on my breaks, he casually looks at me and then keeps walking. Every time I go over there I feel like I am in a different universe...
4. If you ever drive down State street do NOT expect to turn left...EVER...for some magical reason it's only allowed on Sundays...AND I HATE trying to turn right during tourist season, all the pedestrians make it impossible!!!
5. And my personal pet peeve (its only in my condo complex) I HATE SPEED BUMPS!!! every 10 feet there is a f'ing speed bump. And I am at the end!!! I think I have to go over about 10 to 15 speed bumps just to get to my house!
QUIRKY:
(;D)
1. Wherever you go, dogs are allowed. I have seen a person bring their dog into a restaurant and no one even gave a second glance.
2. We are literally two miles from the beach and they won't let us into the club because someone is wearing shorts....uhhhhh whaaa?
3. It is a JOURNEY to find fast food places. Almost all of them are in THE MOST difficult places to find.
4. There is a DISGUSTING Kmart but they refuse to put in a Target.
5. The closest Target, major restaurants (applebee's etc), and even Jamba Juice are an hour away.
I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feeeeeel soooo baaaaaaaaad!
GAH! that song was playing over and over in my head the whole time I was writing this!
Anyways, I am sure there is more so there may be a part two later on. Life is good, and is starting to get back into place. I am where I am suppose to be and definitely happy to be here.
Fun post and am happy you're happy.
ReplyDeleteOh this totally cracked me up. God love Californication.
ReplyDeleteI went to college (SBCC...and my husband went to Brooks) in Santa Barbara...I enjoyed reading your list!
ReplyDelete