Tuesday, August 24, 2010

These are a few of my favorite things part deux

Once again, no we are not dancing around in a gazebo with some German boy singing about our age. Its a list of funny, weird, annoying observations I have made in my life here in Santa Barbara.

Why the hell isn't this here when I need it????:

1. Why do we allow a nasty Kmart while Target has empty land just uglying up the area because the county won't let them build???



2. This is probably everywhere but why the hell does Bed Bath and BEYOND not carry bar soap????? You can't go beyond if you don't even have the bath yet!!! Why does Adam Sandler get a frickin' time changing remote and I can't even get bar soap???

3. Why do grocery stores not carry funnels???

4. All the gyms close at 11 or 12!!! and on weekend they close at 8! How am I suppose to be able to go? Everywhere else but here is 24 hours in some place in the vicinity.
Seems like the logical places never have what I need...

hello! weirdness has entered the building!!!!

1. They are giving out TEQUILA shots in the grocery store in the middle of the day...you have to show your ID and everything!!! Are we condoning drinking and driving now? Nope, now its drinking and grocery shopping. Why the hell would Albertsons give out alcohol like its a bacon wrapped sausages???


2. Crazy old lady randomly turn around and walk up to me and my friends and say "how would you feel if you were forced to retire after 40 years of teaching?"... and then turn around and walk away...WHAAAA? We are still puzzled by that moment.


3. If you are SHAKING profusely, cannot even read the GIANT numbers on the gas pump, and are oblivious to your children RUNNING around the gas station, you probably should not be allowed to drive...just sayin'


TOURISTS... I'm gunna kill 'em

1. Going the WRONG way on a one way street. I know you are in a different city but there are SIGNS people!


2. If the walk/don't walk sign has a big RED hand that means DON'T WALK!!!! cars have to be able to drive people!!!!



3. There is never ANY parking!!!!

4. Don't stop in the middle of the friggen street to take a picture!!! jeez tourists and traffic just don't mix I guess...


Holidays

1. FIESTA: basically a mexican version of st patty's day...where you drink like hell and throw at anyone and everyone plastic eggs full of confetti (that if they stay on your skin long enough stain your skin whatever color the confetti is, I found that out when my friend threw an egg down my dress). it is also the holiday where bars have to post a sign saying "NO mariacci bands". weirdly enough I think its bigger than cinco de mayo.


2. St patrick's day... DO NOT expect to get into ANY bar that is even CLOSE to irish (even the english bars) they are FULL and there is a line around the building to get in. basically a typical st pattys day full of green and drinking things that are green.


3.Haloween: Don't expect to get anywhere near IV unless you are a resident. even then you have to show proof you live in IV. There are THOUSANDS of people that come to UCSB just for Haloween. its a day where girls dress like sluts and guys love it. Don't go to sb if your claustrophobic. (ps: this pic is actual IV on haloween)



ahh I know I will miss the antics of SB when I am gone, but I am sure every town has crazy stuff happening....I love/hate you SB!!!

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