Funny things about being an amputee

It's been 3 years since I lost my leg... not a sad thing for me, but people still seem to feel sorry for me. DON'T! haha my life is so much better without it! I would have never met the people I have met, heard stories I have heard, and found a new sort of twisted humor out of it all...

Some of the things I would never thought I would say in my life:

"Hold on let me put my leg on"

"My feet are cold...I mean foot"

 "My feet hurt...I mean foot"

"My feet are wet...I mean foot"

"It's my leg corner!"

"My hydraulics are squeaky" 

"Hold on, have to charge my leg"

"EFF my leg just died!"

"Tattoo my leg, I'll be back for it later"

"I have to get my leg calibrated"

"My leg guy just called me"

"There are three dismembered feet on my bedroom floor right now..."

Some of the things I would never thought I would have heard in my life:

"If I were you and lost my leg I think I would have killed myself" (wtf?!)

"MOM WHERE DID HER LEG GO?!"

"MOM SHE HAS A REALLY SMALL LEG!"

"MOM LOOOOK" (frantically pointing at me)

"MOM SHE HAS A ROBOT LEG!"

(Man) "Did you break your leg?" (7 yr old cousin) "NO SHE DOESN'T HAVE ONE!!"

(if you haven't been able to tell children like to yell)

"Did a shark eat your leg?!"

"Thank you for your service" "I am not a Vet"...awkward silence

Some things people say to me not realizing my leg is missing (AKA awkward central) then I have to explain my leg is not THERE:

"Did you tear your ACL?"

 (apparently the most common knee injury. I hear this ALOT)

"What happened to your knee?"

"Your knee looks out of place"

"Your knee looks weird"

(walk up to cashier with crutches) "Oh did you break your ankle?"

 (I always imagine their face when I walk away...I get embarrassed for them)

And a lot more of how did you break/hurt your ankle/knee...stop being so nosy people! You make yourself look stupid!

There are a ton of jokes that I never thought I would make but that will have to be in another blog because there are plain just too many...

I never take anything serious from people about missing my leg and I just decide to find it all amusing... even the rude comments. 

Why not, right? :)